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SPEARHEADED BY STARS INCLUDING KYLIE, THESE WOMEN WOULD RATHER CELEBRATE BEING SINGLE THAN SETTLE FOR MR MEDIOCRE

By Lucy Bulmer

On a cold February morning Roz Colthart decided she deserved a break.

She’d been working hard on the launch of her new business, and a rest was long overdue.

Two hours and a couple of phone calls later, she and one of her closest girlfriends were booked on a five-day trip to New York leaving in a little over 48 hours – on Valentine’s Day, to be precise.

Roz, 35, smiled to herself as she realised that, had she been in a relationship, there was no way she would  be able to make the trip.

Roz, from Edinburgh, ploughs most of her time and energy into her business, a retail website specialising in black and white clothes.

When she’s not at work, she’s out with friends, playing tennis or going to the gym.

She takes regular holidays and weekends away and her life is happy, busy and packed to the brim.

She may have been without a man for the last 18 months, but she’s no Bridget Jones sad singleton.

“I love living on my own,” she says.

“You can’t underestimate the freedom.

"I can go where I like and do what I like when I like.

"And I love being single in my 30s, because once you’ve developed a career and earned a certain amount of money that’s when the fun really starts.”

Roz is typical of a growing tribe of single-by-choice women in their late 20s, 30s and 40s, dubbed the ‘Freemales’: women who are doing their own thing and are far too happy to consider letting the demands of a man clip their wings.

Kylie, who celebrates her 40th birthday this week, hit the nail on the head when she commented in a recent interview that she may never get married and doubts she will ever have a conventional family life.

“I think that perhaps this isn’t the right path for me,” said the star, whose positive attitude and independence are making her a poster girl for Freemales everywhere.

Cameron Diaz, 35, is another member of the growing Freemale population.

She recently announced: “I love being alone and being by myself.

"And I’m really good at it, too.

"Not in a weird ‘leave me alone’ kind of way, but I’m just much more comfortable when I’m by myself.”

She is far from alone.

A report released last month by the Office for National Statistics reveals that the number of women in the UK aged 25 to 44 who are living alone has doubled in the last two decades.

Sociologist Dr Jan Macvarish, from the University of Kent, has studied the trend and thinks it’s set to carry on growing.

“We’re already seeing lots of adaptations, like properties and holidays being designed with single people in mind,” she points out.

So why aren’t people pairing up?

“I think it’s because we don’t see much of the positive side of commitment in the media these days – the TV and papers seem full of relationships that end badly,” she explains.

Roz says: “I’ve accepted it’s unlikely that I’m going to have children.

"I can’t see myself settling in the near future and I certainly can’t hear my biological clock ticking.

"Like Kylie, I think I’m missing the marriage gene.”

Freemale Lucy Wray, from Manchester, also feels that past relationships have cramped her style.

“I’ve done things I simply wouldn’t be able to do if I was in a couple – like spend 14 months travelling around the world.

"Maybe it’s a bit selfish, but I love being able to do what I want, when I want.

"So many of my coupled-up friends spend their weekends doing things they have to do rather than things they want to do,” she says.

At 26, Lucy, a PR account executive, is quite comfortable with the idea that her single status may be permanent.

“I’d rather be on my own than compromise.

"I’m so close to my friends and family that I don’t fear being on my own – being single doesn’t mean being alone.”

'SEX? CHOCOLATE IS A LOT MORE SATISFYING'

Lorraine Arrano, 31, from Northamptonshire, loves her job in marketing for Champneys. She has been single for more than a year

I’ve only had one relationship since my mid-20s.

I was nowhere near as happy as I am now, and I was much lonelier.

The time I’ve spent single has been so much better and now I’m not even looking for a man.

Now my diary is as packed as I can have it without dropping from exhaustion.

As for intimacy and sex – well that’s what chocolate is for!

I do so much other stuff, I don’t miss it, and I’ve got lots of close friends I can turn to if I’m upset about something.

I would like children one day. I’m not going to lie and say it wouldn’t be nice to meet someone special in the future, but I’m not going to spend my life looking.

And if it’s not meant to be for me, so be it.

Everyone should try being single – it’s how you get to know yourself and it means you’re not afraid of being alone.

I’ve surprised myself with what I can do – I’ve decorated my flat, grouted my bathroom and sailed through having the drains taken up. If I was with a man, I’d feel less than capable in those areas – and now I know I’m not!”

 

Is it better to be single or loved up? Are people who desperately seek a man far too needy? Or are those who are eternally single way too fussy for their own good? Who do you think has more fun? Is it important to have stability in your life?

CLICK HERE TO JOIN THE DISCUSSION NOW

 

Photography: Alan Peebles, David Fisher, Jamie Hughes, Filmmagic.com, Landmark Media. Hair and make-up Beverly Williams, Sara Bowden.

For more details on Roz’s clothes visit black-essentials.com